11 in 2011-Day 2

I've linked up with mj @ teaching in heels and kit @ step into my life for 11 in 2011.  For some reason it is very difficult for me to type 2011...every time i blog and type the year I have to go back and correct the date...for some reason I keep typing 2001..im a little behind....2001

What is your favorite Christmas memory?

My favorite Christmas memory this year was just being with my family.  Nothing specific really stands out..i'm just glad that we were all here, healthy, and in the same place.  Last year C lived 3 hours away, I hated my apartment, roommate situation was beyond awkward and made Christmas eve, which is very important to me, a complete mess!  I didn't get to have a tree in my apartment last year either....NO TREE=VERY UPSET ASHLEY.  So this year I loved that C and I lived in the same town and we got to have the perfect Christmas Eve this year:)! 

One highlight of Christmas for me, besides what I have already said, was Christmas night.  My family, like usual, headed the movies.  Half of my family went to see Yogi Bear while C, my mom, and I went to watch Gulliver's Travels.  When the movie was over we walked outside and it was snowing very lightly.  It literally only lasted a minute or so, but it was a perfect ending to the day! 

My favorite memory of all time comes from 2004 though.  I know that is forever ago..but that Christmas really sticks out from all the others.  It doesn't stick out for being amazing or really special, but rather for being very difficult and sad.  My grandpa, who was the most special person in the world to me, passed away in October of 2004.  It was a complete shock and very hard!  It was the first time I had ever lost anyone in my life, and losing someone that really is one of a kind is never easy.  My family tried to go about things as normal, but we all knew nothing was okay or normal.  We all just slapped on smiles and tried to act happy basically.  About two weeks prior to Christmas the memorial established for my grandfather online was about to expire, meaning that any of the kind words from those who loved him would go away forever unless we printed them off.  I remember my mom getting on the website ready to order the book with all the families memories and such of him, but what she found instead was that the memorial had already been disabled.  We were all pretty upset over it!  The memorial had very sweet memories and pictures from family all over the united states that couldn't necessarily make it back for the funeral.  ANYWAYS, fast forward to Christmas night...we all begin to open presents and we were almost done with the printer started going off....i got up and walked over to find the memorial posts being printed out....I get chills even thinking about it because we were all pretty clueless as to how it could have happened.  I'm pretty sure that was my grandfather's gift to all of us. 

What was your favorite Christmas memory??

11 in 2011

Well, i've noticed that this year most people are saying that resolutions really aren't their thing...and maybe they are onto something with setting goals instead. In the past I have made resolutions, but it seems that no matter how many new years that I ring in...I'm so over the unrealistic expectations that I set for myself within weeks of making them. SOOOO, I will totally be a copycat this year and set some "goals" for myself.


1.) Stay on my health kick. I started my diet back in October. Everyone said that I picked the worst time to start a diet seeing that the holidays were about to hit. But, i'm SO glad that I went through with it. After putting on 60 pounds over the last 3 years..i was ready to get back in the gym and get healthy again. I'm almost 30 pounds lighter now and im feeling GREAT. I still want to lose about 40 more. I don't want to be unrealistic..but I do want to be healthy. Working out 6 days a week makes me feel great...so I would like to stick with that feeling.

2.) I would like to start running. I "run" about 6 miles between the elliptical and arch trainer..but i want to run ...i think im going to try a 5k in February! I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH THIS GOAL. It is something I have never tried.

3.) I def want to work on having a better attitude toward things I cannot change.


4.) Being fearless! I know that sounds so cliche and i have seen it on many blogs..but I really would love to accomplish this. I hate that I let fear keep me from doing things. I hate the fear of failure because I believe it stops me from pursuing my dreams.

5.) Dreams....yeah....I want to write more. I tell myself everyday how many people write their whole lives and are never published..so once again I let the fear of that hold me back. But I'M GOING TO CONTINUE WRITING and getting better at it this year.

6.) Being a better blogger. Even if no one reads this I will be able to look back on it and remember things that I would probably otherwise forget.
7.) Travel. I bought a plane ticket to NYC with a friend and cannot wait till march to go. I've never been! I worry about spending too much money on travel..but traveling truly TRULY makes me happy. I want to make seeing places a definite priority.


8.) Continue making great grades in grad school. Even if i hate the program..i'm going to give it my all.

9.) Be a better teacher. I feel like I have slacked off and I DO NOT want my students to suffer because of it. Yeah, I never EVER thought I would be teaching ESL classes to people twice my age..but God blessed me with this job..so I need to do the best I can possibly do. I will be a GREAT teacher this year...even if that means staying late when I would rather be watching C coach his heart out.

10.) Be a better girlfriend. I have the world's best boyfriend...I don't know how he puts up with me.

11.) Being a better person in general(what does that even mean?) I just want to DO MORE..help out more....I don't know in what capacity yet...but I don't want to just sit around when I am perfectly capable of making a difference...even if it is small!!


What are your goals for 2011????

-a

Get outta here 2010...

Whoa, what a year. I cannot believe today is the last day of 2010. I can't say i'm sad to see it go though. It has def been a year of change for me. So many HUGE things happened this year. It was hard and so rocky at some points...a great deal of growing up...laughter, tears, memories..i'm happy and blessed to see a new year come in though.

I would have to say that every year has a certain theme..and this year for me..the theme was GROWING UP! It was truly a year of coming into my own, failing at things, realizing things I should have learned a LOT sooner, making friends, losing friends...I could go on an on...

10 things I learned in '10

1.) One of the first things I learned in 2010 was who my friends are. I realized that unfortunately people change when they grow up....they move on..and sometimes friendships don't stick..it was a hard lesson to learn...and as corny as it sounds...it was painful...but at the same time really really worth it. I can now see things that I couldn't while I was IN the situation...I'm better now..it's better now. I will forever chose my friends more wisely as well as trying my best to be the best friend I can be to those around me. I honestly feel that is one thing that God wants from us...to do our best with our lives...show that in everything we do...even friendships. I'm blessed now with some really amazing friendships.

(My friend Kayla drew this for me on graduation day...she couldn't be there..but this cracked me up)

2.) Loving someone cannot be stopped by distance. I lived 3 hours away from C for the first 5 months of 2010. It was hard..but so worth it. It taught me so many lessons and allowed me to spend my last semester of college with good friends being crazy and spontaneous.

(C and me ...not in 2010..im pretty sure this pic was in '08..but it's the first pic i came across of us:) hah...thank the Lord my hair is not that length anymore..what was I thinking?)

3.) Completing goals is so worth it. I graduated college this year. What a huge accomplishment for me. I started out college 4 years ago and did not do so hot my first year...I skipped class ALLL THE TIME. But I got back in there, got my GPA up, got a scholarship, and accomplished something that no one can ever take away from me.

(Me and my friend Will on graduation day...loved graduating with one of my good friends that I met in college)

(Me after graduation..i was so pumped! Please ignore the messy hair and sweaty looks..it was like 105 degrees the day i graduated..ew)

4.) I don't like living alone. I did this a few years back when my roommate moved out, and I did it in Jan and Feb pretty much. My roommate was around sporadically, but usually not. Maybe once every 2 weeks. We had very scary and weird things happen at our apt...people coming in, finding...adult videos and male clothes in our attic(yeah, im so not kidding) scariness. BOTTOM LINE...I love having roommates...living alone is really not my thing. I get bored.

5.) Failing is okay. I learned a very important lesson this year. I am so scared of failure that it is RIDICULOUS. I noticed, for the first time in my life, that sometimes i just WON'T do things because I think I might fail at it and I worry what people will think. STUPID!!!! I would rather fail then never try. I have failed at something twice now..something big and important for my future...i won't give up though..i will keep trying till i succeed.

6.) I love writing(this isn't a new discovery) this is something i've known since i was a little girl. My Bachelor's degree probably would have been in creative writing(but once again..i was worried about what people would think about my writing)...my last semester of college I finally gave in and took a creative writing class. I have never felt more fulfilled with anything. I looked forward to assignments...and I began to LOVE when people would respond to my writing......whether it needed improvement or not...it was a wonderful feeling.

7.) I changed my career goals. I went through 2010 thinking law school would come RIGHT AFTER graduation...BUT I believe the Lord had other plans. I'm in grad school now and start the NTL this summer.

8.) Being fit and healthy makes me happy. I put on 60 pounds slowly over the last 3 years....well...i am NOW 30 POUNDS LIGHTER because of lifestyle changes i've made. I still want to lose more weight..but to me it's more than a number..it's a change I want to bring with me from 2010 until forever. I love feeling healthy!

9.) Harboring hurt and pain does NO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

10.) The most important thing in life is being happy. And I def am.

I have so many goals for 2011. I'll post those tomorrow though:) I am going to do Kendi's 30 for 30 remix challenge in jan too...I'M EXCITED...i'll post about that tomorrow too. I hope everyone has an amazing new year's eve night...be safe!!!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR.

Boots, WHERE ARE YOU!!!!??

It's 2:03. I should be sleeping. HOWEVER, i'm up with debit card in hand trying to order those beautiful boots you see in the last post. Maybe God intervened though because THE WEBSITE IS MYSTERIOUSLY DOWN? Maybe God knew those beauties wouldn't fit my one freakishly large calf (yes, i said one...get off my back...i can't help it) or maybe he knows im making bad decisions in my sleep deprived state. EITHER WAY...THAT WEBSITE BETTER BE BACK UP ASAP!

maybe the internet fairies will hear my desperate boot needin' plea and make my night....I NEED THESE BOOTS.

Also..i'm thinking very seriously about doing Kendi's 30 day remix challenge..........I really must be delusional. no shopping and only wearing 30 pieces for a month? Sounds crazy, but fun...we shall see how I feel about that tomorrow when I've had more sleep.

-a

Bye Bye Christmas.

I am a bad blogger. Mainly because no one reads this thing. EVER. I know my life isn't very exciting...but 5 followers is kinda sad:).




I hope you 5..if you read this..had a VERY VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS. Something about holidays makes me sad..i know that is bizarre. I think it is because I get soooooo excited for like 2 months straight..then I realize it is quickly coming to an end. Who knows! I do KNOW that I had a good Christmas though. Christmas eve was my fave by far.



Last Christmas Eve was not that great. I lived in a really uncomfortable situation and we didn't get to properly celebrate because C lived 3 hours away and when he was down...things were just bizarre because of my apartment situation. HOWEVER, this year..we more than compensated. On Christmas Eve morning I went and worked out and then headed to C's house. He greeted me with beautiful flowers and homemade breakfast!!! It was wonderful! We hung out for a while then headed to my mom's house to bake and decorate some cookies. We hung out there all day and then headed to the movies with my Mom and watched Little Fockers. I was not impressed. At all. Afterwards C and I headed back to his place where we grilled Cajun chicken and veggies before we opened presents. He did soooo good. He always does...but this year he got me lots of cool stuff but THE BIG present he got me was so thoughtful and sweet. He got me a hope chest that had things inside of it for when we get married one day and get to live together for the first time. A big "G" letter for my future last name. A picture that contained a scripture from Corinthians that I love. And some other cool stuff for our future home! I loved that it was so thoughtful.



Christmas day was fun. Family stuff, lunch, presents, nap, movies...the usual Christmas day activities. This time though we watched Gulliver's Travels. I loved it. Very cute and funny! The bad thing about Christmas? Oh yeah, i had the stomach virus. I kid you not. I was pretty sick and miserable the whole time. But on a happy note(if you can be happy about having the stomach flu on Christmas??) I lost weight instead of gaining during Christmas ha!




I'm thankful for another year with my family! I am a little relieved the holidays are over though.


I have the whole week off. yay!




NOW....I want these boots....but I could def live with


this pair.








Also...I am in LOVE with this scarf

ALSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...i got this duvet and shower curtain from urban outfitters...duvet-20.00...shower curtain 12. YES FOR LESS THAN 50 BUCKS I GOT A DUVET AND SHOWER CURTAIN FROM URBAN OUTFITTERS..........YES!!!!!!! Plz...someone...make me stay off this website. I'm going to go broke buying stuff.

I would love to post pictures of my Christmas..UNFORTUNATELY..my computer hates me at the moment..boo.

Weekend Reflections.

The weekend was good. And for once..I couldn't wait for the week to get here because only 2 very short work days away from 2 weeks of Christmasy/New Years bliss! Yay.

Friday night I had to work at this drive through late display that my community is hosting. It funds non-profit organizations in town. I will say that I went into the situation with a bad attitude because I had been on my feet since 6 am that morning..hard work out...then a day of shopping with my mom...followed by standing in the freezing cold rain for a couple hours taking donations and annoying people by asking for their zip codes. Have I mentioned I hate the cold? I do. I DON'T hate winter, I just hate the cold. I know that makes no sense. But I really like being indoors and looking out knowing that is so cold! I like curling up in pjs with hot chocolate, fuzzy boots, a blanket, reading a great book. I LOVE WINTER/HATE THE COLD! Anywho, it was freezing and the minute I got out of my car at this place it began to snow/sleet/rain mix. It was pretty dreadful for the first hour of it...but after my feet froze to the point of no feeling it was fine! I was happy to leave though..get in my warm car and go home and get straight into bed.

Saturday I spent shopping with C and thoroughly enjoying it, until his grandfather called. I usually don't post this kinda stuff on my blog...but I don't really care. I love my boyfriend with all my heart...but his family..they are hard to handle. Thankfully there is a 10 hour cushion between us and them. They say very mean and hurtful things regarding me all the time like "oh, you have a bachelors degree in English...yeah like that is going to be useful" (im paraphrasing and exaggerating a little) but it is ALWAYS negative and always in regard to me. The comment on Saturday was "so, has ashley dropped out of grad school yet????" im not even sure what that is suppose to mean..but it hurt my feelings. They just seem to wait for me to screw up or fail. The comment a few weeks before that was "oh, she is going to be in school for life and you will have to pay off her student loans".....I don't understand them. My family is so positive and encouraging when it comes to my education..so it's hard for me to understand their point of view. A lot of times I really just want to GIVE IT TO THEM....just ask them what the heck their deal with me is....but then I realize it really doesn't matter. It's hurtful..yeah...it's mean..yeah...but I can't let that stop me from doing what I want to do. Truthfully they don't even know me that well...after 3 years they don't even try to get to KNOW ME they just have to gripe about my career aspirations or my family or whatever it is they dream up that day. I WILL NEVER do that to my children or grandchildren....NEVER. I mean sure if i was a drug addict or prostitute with 12 kids that runs an underground drug ring...GRIPE..BY ALL MEANS. But just because you think I'm not successful by your standards? bs. Waiting for people to fail must be a pitiful life.

The rest of Saturday was very good..we met up with my mom and went to a few places to finish up some shopping! We grabbed some food and went back to C's place to watch movies. I watched Sundays at Tiffany's and was soo sooo soo disappointed. Why do they take amazing books and wreck them with horrid movies. I hated the movie...nothing like the book really...acting was horrible...they took the magic from the book and just ruined it. I felt the same way with Nicholas Sparks book Last Song....Miley Cyrus should never act.ever.especially in Nicholas Sparks movies.

Sunday...relax:)

Now just two days or work(short days) and im off for 2 weeks..yes!

I have been blogging for a while now..and i have 5 followers...that is sad...lol.

Some really random weekend pics.



Sleeping Choodle!!!!!!!!!! He is too cute.


My ultra lame Christmas Eve shirt that I plan to wear with PJ's while
opening presents....holla.



love my friends:)me and nat!

it's officially Christmas Week! YES! Have a Merry Christmas!

Bad moods.

I'm in a horrible mood today. It started out okay. I was able to sleep in slightly...and by that I mean 650! Yes, sadly that is sleeping in for me. I woke up on my own at 5 but forced myself back to sleep until 650 and then i was just over it...up..ready for the day.

I really don't have a "good reason" to be in such a horrible mood. BUT I'm horrified by a certain situation I have found myself in. I don't want to go into detail b/c even though it royally sucks..i know that God is dealing with it and I cannot dwell on it.

Oh, also i'm in a horrible mood b/c i have to work for 2 hours in the cold tomorrow night. I love winter but I had cold weather...ask me how that makes sense? Oh right, it doesn't. I dread it so bad...and i'm annoyed that I have to be there. Don't I work Monday-Friday..no nights or weekends for a reason? Yeah apparently that doesn't matter.

So today when my bad mood was sparked...i ate some pineapple(b/c when you're on a diet and you cant drown your sorrows in icecream, you pretend that the friggin' pineapples taste just as good when you know they really don't) and then I went out for some retail therapy! I discovered this PERFECT little shop in my town (apparently it's been there for 20 years...i've never even entered the place and i've lived here forever) Anywho, the shop had everything you could ever hope or want to have for your home. I had to resist the urge to spend way too much money in there...b/c well..i don't have a home yet so that would be pointless. I did buy a roasted espresso candle though. It smells AMAZING...I cannot wait to go home, put on pajamas, curl up with a good book, and light that bad boy:) But first...2 more hours of being frozen in this miserable office!

I will end this post by saying I have the most amazing boyfriend of all times...even when im cranky, grouchy, snappy with him...he just stays perfect, sweet, kind, loving supportive...on and on! I'm blessed and I hope one day I can possess an ounce of his calm, sweet, and unbelievably kind character.

Random though...i just finished reading James Patterson's Sundays at Tiffany's. Love! I usually don't like books with fantasy elements..however, I am a fan of this one...READ IT! Then watch the new movie that just came out..go lifetime.

Happy Thursday(even if this did start out as a rant)..the weekend is right around the corner.

this is my lame attempt of slapping on a happy face before I head to teach my students tonight..It will be our last class this year! I wonder if they are as psyched about that as I am! Ignore the blur that makes me look slightly cross-eyed.
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